Week 2 Pickles

So after a SUPERIOR WEEK ONE SHOWING, 10-6 to be exact, I am one step closer to the prize. Five games seperate myself and Mr. BL and guess what? The difference can be made this weekend (those games are in BOLD and itallics). BTW, the 7 games we differed on last week, JG, took 6 of em. King Kong ain't got shit on me!

HOME TEAM in CAPS:

TEXANS +6.5 Pitts
Pitt had easily the most impressive win of the opening weekend while Hou still looks like an expansion team. After this week someone will buy the FireDomCapers.com domain. -BL

Sgt. Slaughter will leave Texas 2-0, HOWEVA, Dom Capers will have his squad fired up to lose by on 4. Texans with the points. -JG

INDY -8.5 Jax
Cut That Meat! Cut That Meat! Here we go Insurance Adjusters, here we go! -JG

Hey some spread huh? If the game was in Jax I coulda been pushed to picking them, but I like Indy in their home opener. -BL

BUCS -2.5 Bills
Cadillac Grills, check out the oil my Cadillac spills, seriously the Bucs were left for dead in the preseason, but parity works in weird ways; i got the Bucs. -BL

The Caddy Waggon loses a passenger this week And seriously, when if Buffalo go to Duffs. The wings are splendiferous! -JG

PHILLY -12.5 San Fran
Mrs. McNabb won't let her boys down. Donovan will be sucking back Campbell's Chunky and be ready to go. In fact, he could probably take 2 or 3 quarters off and the Eagles would still win by 13. -JG

Now this an interesting line with SF coming off a big win vs Martz's Folly, and Philly coming out of ATL with a gimpy McNabb. This is a statement game for the Eagles, look for them to easily cover the spread. -BL

CAR +3.5 New England Chowdah
All Pats here and while we're at it, how come no one ever discusses how hot Cheetara was on the Thundercats? Like before I knew what hot was, I knew she was smokin'. I think Panthro def tried to play dip the tip, def. -JG

Car couldn't beat the San Antonio Saints, and with that I say if not Tom Brady then who? If not Corey Dillon who? If not Richard Seymour who? I got the Pats. -BL

CHI +1.5 Det
I watched all 4 quarters of the Bears/Skins game and at times I expected the Bears to punt on 3rd down. Det is trying to make a run for a playoff spot and will feast on the Bears. -BL

The Cedric Benson Era will begin. The next Rashan Salaam, Curtis Enis or the next, um, who was there after Sweetness? Damn, this is gonna bother me. Anyway, DeBears D will keep them in it. -JG

CINCI -2.5 Minnesota
Minnesota looked terrible week 1 and the Carson Palmer era officially began last week. Get that man a Bobblehead people! Daunte is letting Randy Moss look like the real force in Minny, I got the Vikings in a old fashion Cincy Romp. -BL

Chad Johnson called out Fred Smoot, hilarious. But Pep won't lay two eggs in his first 2, right? All Purple here AND they may even use the Burger King Guy for the Hail Mary. -JG

TENN +3.5 Baltimore
There's comedy and then there's high comedy and there is my version of the Ray Lewis Dance. I actually think the Ravens lost on Sunday night because of Phil Collins' Tonight, Tonight blaring during the player intros. Steve McNair, get the ice bath ready. Hark go the Ravens. -JG

Well I was the biggest Norm Chow booster last week and all he could muster (vs a very tough Steeler D) was a pedestrian 7 points. I got Balt and my boy Jamal Lewis in this one. -BL

ZONA +1.5 St. Lunatics
Mike Martz, oh how I loathe thy. You seem to have a nack for making easy decisions seem so difficult. Let's just hope you don't outthink yourself again cause Ari is awaiting the Matt Leinart parade. -BL

Round of applause for St. Lou and their roll in destroying the Survivor hopes of thousands of teams. THIS is the week you should take them. -JG

SEA -1.5 Mike Vick Experience
Matt Hassel-blech vs. the ATL D? Um, as a not so proud owner of Hassel-blech, consider me scurred. Mexi-CAN. -JG

The Mike Vick train continues to roll as the Mike Holmgren march towards obscurity continues. Sea is a team that should never be on MNF or ESPN. ATL baby, Lenox Mall in da house. -BL

J!E!T!S! -6.5 Mia
YOU PLAY TO WIN THE GAME! HELLO?! -JG

The Saban experience rolls into the Meadowlands, while the Jets need a win to reclaim the overhype thrown on them by Mike and the Maddog types. I got the Green Lantern. -BL

GB -6.5 Cleveland
GB is another old reliable that let me down last week, but with Javon Walker tearing up his knee, have the Cheeseheads finally hit a rebuilding period? Not this week; Romeo still looking for win number 1, i got the Pack. -BL

Braylon had 2 catches last weekend. A buddy of mine went to a game in Lambeau against the Bears. While tailgating, he actually ate bear. As in, a group was serving bear. Go Pack. -JG

DEN -2.5 Whale's Vagina (San Diego)
I guess the Broncos, although the season premiere of Antonio Gates scares me. Only because this game is in Denver, oh man, wagering on Jake Plummer (shaking my head). -JG

Quick question people. Is Jake Plummer still the Broncos QB? He is? Really? Well I got the San Diego "Super Chargers" -BL

OAK +1.5 Chiefs
Oak always plays hard at home, I mean it is the Black Hole people, but I don't think their Run D can put a dent into the Holy Roman Priest. Give me the Chiefs (looks good but who are the Chefs?) -BL

That's great, but who are the Chefs? The Chiefs enter the black hole, but they have some swagger. "I don't want to be named as a woman-beater," Larry Johnson said. "That is not my M.O." Well, maybe not swagger, but they'll have enough. -JG

NO -3.5 Giants
I hear the road team is gonna have a ton of crowd support, but you know what? It won't be enough. Something's happening with these Saints. Something right before are very eyes. -JG

Oh when the Saints, Oh when the Saints, Go Marching in to the Meadowlands, look for Deuce to slice and dice for their first road-home game of the year. -BL

DAL -6.5 Skins
GGreGG Williams = low score. Low score=close game. And seriously, Mark Brunell on Monday Night...I've been swimming in Raw Sewage...I Love It. C'mon Hogs. -JG

The Redskins finally settled on a QB for the future, sadly he is 35 with no chance of completing a pass past 20 yrds. The good news is the Cowboys have Drew Bledsoe at QB. Look for the Redskins LB core to blitz that statue all night long. Hail to the Redskins. -BL
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Standings:
JG 10-6
BL 5-11

-Taylor Bunts