Forget the curve ball. Give 'em the heater!

Tuesday, April 11, 2006

Law & Order : Raleigh-Durham

WWJBD? What would Jerry Briscoe Do? That is the main question to ask after exonerating evidence in the Duke Lacrosse Rape scandal has come to light. See this whole scandal played out just like an episode of everyone's favorite procedural drama.

It started like every Law and Order, a crime with a mountain of evidence pointing at one suspect. We have all seen this before, Briscoe woulda walked in to that house full of blood, lacrosse sticks, and panties, bent over examining the evidence and quip "I wouldn't want to be in net for this game"

Cue Music, Dum DUM, Dum Dum Dum Dum Dum.

I mean look at some of the evidence, my favorite being the email sent by Ryan McFadyen in which he boasts to his friends that he is going to "to have some strippers over" and then "killing the bitches". This is classic Law and Order stuff.

To people over the age of 40 a college student telling people he was going to kill a stripper seems to be a pathological nightmare, but to anyone who has spent time in a lockerroom in the past decade just had to laugh. See McFadyen was being Shakespearean, "To Kill" means to have sex with as in "To Kill some Poo-Poo" or "Jessica Alba is so hot I could kill her".

Then after what would be 40 minutes in Law and Order time we find out that actually there is little to no evidence pointing at Duke in the incident. They got us again. Who could it have been? Duke's coniving older mother? Someone who hated Duke so much to frame them?

If this was really L&O we would have the UNC Tarheel burst into court screaming "Yeah I did it, I hated them so much that flames, on the side of my face, heaving, breathless flames."

You know what on second thought with all the bodily fluids involved in this case, let's call the guys at CSI.

- BL


Blogger Satchmo said...

Great post, but his name was Lenny Briscoe. Jerry Orbach was the actor.

1:23 PM


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