There's No Crying in T-Ball

I am addicted to the Little League World Series. And it’s not due to any Michael Jackson-like tendencies or any peder-ass qualities I may possess. I think it has something to do with my own Little League experience. You see, one year, when I was eligible, I made the All-Star team for Largo Little League on the west coast of Florida. This turn of events was surprising for one reason really. In previous years, the kids on each team voted for the composition of the team. Sadly, being Jewish, my parents sent me to Solomon Schecther day school and I was only friendly with the players on my team. Hence, I could never garner enough votes. But this one special year, the coaches selected the team and I made it!

But here’s the catch: the coach of the team also selected his son. And lo and behold, what position did he play? Shortstop. The very same position I played with the grace of Ozzie Smith and the cannon of a young Jose Reyes. I don’t think I need to ask you to guess who started for said All-Star team. But, after a first round victory in which I finally got in as a pinch-hitter (producing the most beautiful bunt ever, a bunt that literally stopped on the third base line, and due to a series of errors, left me sitting atop third base), I thought I had earned a chance to start at short in the second round. But, no, Daddy had sonny boy play short again and his two errors had a direct impact on our loss. Man, it was awesome seeing him cry. What a pansy (The two of us never spoke or saw each other again until high school. Ironically, we went to the same magnet program. I was a loser. He dated hot older chicks. I guess I’m still jealous to the day.).

Anyway, I long for that time, a time when I could go outside anytime I wanted and play baseball. I find that when I watch now, I picture myself out there and wonder, what if that kid’s father put me in for his son? Could we have made it to Williamsport? Then, reality sinks in. Probably not. After all, I’m Jewish.

Backwords K
Backwords K is a contributor to the wonderful world of Taylor Bunts